3 Games to Give-A-Way!

“It is interesting to note that engaging in sexual conversations with one’s spouse … is positively related to sexual satisfaction for both genders.” 

So say Ashdown, Hackathorn & Clark in their 2011 paper “In and Out of the Bedroom: Sexual Satisfaction in the Marital Relationship.”


Their study suggests that “intimate sexual conversation increases sexual satisfaction,” especially for females. Intimate conversation seems important for arousal.

This is part of what this game is about; providing a very simple way to begin to take greater risks in talking very candidly with your beloved!  A penny for your thoughts? YES!

The study sounds a bit more clinical…

It is interesting to note that engaging in sexual conversations with one’s spouse and oral sex were positively related to sexual satisfaction for both genders.

The finding that intimate sexual conversations increase sexual satisfaction for females is not surprising because it virtually replicates the findings of Barrientos and Paez (2006), who suggest that one possible explanation is that women who feel comfortable enough to communicate with their spouse on such an intimate level are much more emotionally attached to and sexually open with their partner than their more close-mouthed counterparts.

Byers and Macneil (2006) found evidence that men’s understanding of their partner’s sexual preferences predicted increased sexual satisfaction for women.

Additionally, long-term couples have likely shared each other’s ideas of sexual scripts (i.e. what actually occurs during each sexual interaction) and have a better understanding of each other’s expectations of ideal foreplay and intercourse duration (Miller & Byers, 2004).

Thus, intimate conversations with one’s partner could be an important way to gain important arousal-related information, as well as sexual confidence, intimacy, and emotional support (Barrientos & Paez, 2006), increasing sexual satisfaction not only for women, but for men as well.

 –  “In and Out of the Bedroom: Sexual Satisfaction in the Marital Relationship;” Ashdown, Hackathorn & Clark (2011)

In our own APA survey (under “Sex Polls” at the top of this site), almost 80% of respondents said that “talking about sex with my partner” was something that was “good” and that they wanted to do alot more!

A great idea! Seems to lead to… all sorts of things, but… where to begin? Pick up a card!

In the meantime, for a chance to win one of three “A Private Affair” games (S&H included), simply complete this sentence in the “Leave a Reply” box below...

In a sexual conversation with my partner, I would like to talk about…

Our draw for 3 Games give-a-way ended at midnight, February 13/13. From our 51 entries, we used a random number generator which came up with entries YS, Robyn B. and Karen. We have written to these winners for their mailing addresses! Congratulations! And we hope you have great fun and more with this!

42 Responses to “3 Games to Give-A-Way!”

  1. Chun says:

    …more frequency in our intimacy!

  2. Russell says:

    …how I can better please and meet her needs.

  3. Melanie says:

    fantasies… then play them out.

    On a side note: have you ever thought of an iPhone app for your game?

  4. TS says:

    Yes! (re the app), AND… we are actually working on it! And the “fantasies” and then “playing them out” IS part of the game as well. Thanks for your comment Melanie!

  5. NJ says:

    Increasing the eroticism of our sexual encounters… and our life together.

  6. YS says:

    How to meet his needs and maintain the excitement.

  7. Lindsey says:

    Trying new things.

  8. Brenda Witherspoon-Bedard says:

    His and mine fantasy’s!

  9. caitlin tate says:

    How to spice it up!

  10. Tammy Dalley says:

    Trying new things that we would both like!

  11. Robyn B. says:

    How to fulfill his needs or fantasies.

  12. Tania B says:

    … How to really blow his mind!

  13. Nickida says:

    How he would want me to spice things up a bit.

  14. Lauren Knott says:

    How to make more time for sexy time.

  15. Christopher says:

    How to grow together, how to have fun together, how to have better sex.

  16. Melissa says:

    Extremely vivid details of what he’d like to do with me!

  17. Mike says:

    More frequency, and maybe some fantasies.

  18. Jackie says:

    What their fantasies are!

  19. Paul says:

    Spice things up!! Very predictable and boring….

  20. Tommy Guraedy says:

    Getting her to initiate more…

  21. David and Dianne says:

    How to get her going!

  22. Becca says:

    Different thing he’d like to try together to add some spice to the usual routine.

  23. rob says:

    Get her interested in our bodies!

  24. Pam says:

    What we each wish the other would do!

  25. James says:

    A way to have more passionate sex and how we could incorporate oral sex into our lovemaking.

  26. Laura says:

    What we both really like and what we both really don’t like.

  27. Cory says:

    To get in the same groove!

  28. Carrie says:

    …the intimate, non-sexual ways my husband could get me in the mood for sex.

  29. Carolyn says:

    How we can keep the physical/sexual part of our relationship strong for the long term.

  30. erin says:

    …how to make it more a part of our relationship even though we don’t see each other often, and are usually tired when we do!

  31. Maegan says:

    … how crazy were going to get tonight

  32. Christina says:

    … doing it more often and spicing it up.

  33. Michael Flory says:

    Her fantasies….

  34. Jaime says:

    …how to be more romantic.

  35. Chris says:

    What new things she would like to try.

  36. Melissa says:

    …deciding to increase the frequency our intimacy even if we are too tired.

  37. Jen says:

    What is lacking… and new positions to try!

  38. GaryB says:

    …now that we’re “empty-nesters,” how can we continue growing in our marriage and intimacy and thoroughly enjoy it?

  39. Amy S. says:

    . . . creative new things (and toys!) to try!

  40. Sarah p says:

    How we can have more fun! 🙂

  41. Howard R says:

    talk about fantasies

  42. Lyle K. says:

    In a sexual conversation with my partner, I would like to talk about…what my partner wants and needs to become sexually satisfied and/or reach orgasm!

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